Park Guy meets Girl with man fear.

I said I would post about park guy, but I should warn you in advance. There's not much of a story to share. It was meaningful for me. But you should be reminded that I'm the girl who has dated two men in her whole lifetime, who hasn't dated in over 8 years, and who still has some lingering "man fear" issues. Anytime I even talk to a potentially available man, it's a milestone.

Sunday evening, after dropping my daughter off at bible study, my 8 year old son begged to go to the park. Being the fabulous mom that I am, I assented. I even promised him a lightsabre rematch. For his birthday, he purchased a second lightsabre, and now it's our favorite mother/son bonding experience. I can totally wipe the floor with him. Who would have thought I'd make an awesome clone trooper? (I really don't know what I'm talking about when it comes to star wars, but I still try to fake it!)

Anyhow, back to the story. So there we were, with our lightsabres in hand, attracting an audience. This man and his son come over and just watch us for what felt like a good five minutes. I, being the weirdo that I am, wish that they would just move along. Can't they see that I'm trying to bond with my son? If I'm being completely honest, I would tell you that I was just a little scared at the prospect of conversing with this man who it seemed might be ringless. Finally, I offer my lightsabre to his son when I realize they aren't moving on. Pure joy for the kids, but me...not so much.

Have I mentioned how awkward I am around men? Especially potentially available men? I keep saying potentially available because I'm not sure that he isn't married. I'm not very good at reading the signs and knowing if someone is truly interested in me. Remember the crush?? Totally read that one wrong!

Anyhow park guy introduced himself and we ended up talking off and on for a while since our kids were playing together. Come to find out, we have some mutual friends, he's familiar with the americorps program I serve in, and he teaches at school where our program serves. Small world.

That's really the extent of it. I really thought he might ask for my number, but he didn't and I didn't offer it. In fact, at the time, I wasn't interested that much. But now, I can't stop thinking about the whole deal. I can't stop thinking about him. Probably because things like this never happen to me. Men never approach me. I've been told I put off a "stay away" vibe. It's like they can sense my fear and unease.

So this is a big deal for me even if nothing ever comes of it. I faced a fear and came out unharmed. And for today, that is enough.

[Posted with iBlogger from my iPhone]