Growing Pains

Right at this very minute I am lying in bed wishing the mechanics of my brain would cease their functions at least temporarily. Just long enough for me to fall asleep. But since that's unlikely to happen, I'm blogging from my phone. That's right. From my beautiful wonderful glorious iPhone. I love it. Just a little.

Since I have yet to procure the appropriate funds to purchase a laptop and the desktop is all the way in the other room and I'm too lazy to move any large muscles, the phone it shall be. I'm actually getting pretty good at typing on these tiny little keys.

I'm lying here trying to decide what I want to share with the Internet tonight. It's not as if I live this wildly fascinating life. In fact, it's quite the opposite. Lately, it seems like I keep running into people who are really living it up. Both in real life and online. People who are going out, even on weeknights! Gasp! They're dating and going to other countries and basically just living an adventurous full life.

I, on the other hand. I was really going to finish that previous sentence until I realized that I didn't anything to end it with. Maybe those mechanics are slowing down and I should seize the opportunity for sleep...

Nah...

I'm not upset with my life at all. I love my life. It's just that I've been doing some introspection. I realize that I missed out on many experiences growing up. Then I jumped into marriage at 20. Baby at 21. Divorce at 25. Death of my husband at 26. I'm not whining, I promise.

I wouldn't trade my kids for anything. And odd as it may seem, I wouldn't trade my past experiences either. Even the traumatic ones.

But I do know this: We NEVER stop growing. I hope I never get to a point where I think I've arrived. I know there are issues in my life that need work. I know that, in many ways, I'm still that nerdy awkward girl who had trouble making new friends. I am so grateful to have a Savior who gets me. Who loves me enough to make me uncomfortable. Must be growing pains.

[Posted with iBlogger from my iPhone]